Tag Archives: Sex ith Plants

The latest college fad – Sex with plants

Are you passionate for your posies? Ready to shag a shrub? Any chance you’re horny for horticulture?

Then the University of Michigan at Ann Arbor is the place for you.

You may also want to meet the University of Michigan’s Sarah Ensor, assistant professor of topics such as “Ecocriticism” and “Gender and Sexuality”.

For whatever bizarre reason, these particular classes come under the purview of the English Department, but I’ve quit trying to figure out the sanity of higher education in America ever since academia started granting Bachelor’s Degrees in Queer Studies.

Anyhow, as reported by Tom Ciccotta of Breitbart.com, Professor Ensor “published an academic journal article this month that argues that humans should establish erotic relationships with plants.”

But wait, it just gets weirder;

Ensor … begins by citing the “Ecosex Manifesto,” which was penned by UC Santa Cruz Professor Elizabeth Stephens. Breitbart News originally reported on Stephens and her “ecosex” movement in September. Then, Stephens was promoting her documentary in which she and others lick trees, roll around in mud, and engage in sexual acts with elements of nature.

Ensor begins her article by citing Stephens’ manifesto. “[Ecosexuals] make love with the earth… We shamelessly hug trees, massage the earth with our feet, and talk erotically to plants,” Stephens wrote.

And for the suckers parents picking-up the tab for their Soy-Boy or Hemale matriculating at the Land of the Big Blue, you can sleep well at night in the knowledge that Ensor is actually being paid to pen such “scholarly” papers with titles such as;

  • Relative Strangers: Contracting Kinship in the Queer Ecology Classroom
  • Queer Fallout: Samuel R. Delany and the Ecology of Cruising
  • Terminal Regions: Queer Ecocriticism at the End