(VIDEO) The Most Useless, Curious and Absurd Borders on the Planet

That’s not a border… that’s a few sticks and a strand of barbed wire on the ground.

I’ll admit it… I’m a map nerd. Have been one since I knew what a map even was.  Without fail, I’ve stumbled upon more than a few somewhat strange borders.

I really do hope you find this both interesting and entertaining.

A little bit of America outside of London.

10).  There really is a US border where no one will check your passport or even care how often you pass from foreign soil onto legitimate US soil (and vice-versa). That would be the sovereign American one-acre plot at the British historical site at Runnymede, the birthplace of democracy in the English-speaking world. Britain ceded the land to the United States in 1965, erecting a memorial to the recently slain Pres. John F. Kennedy.

“But I went to high school in White Bear Lake… go Bears.”

9). The northernmost point of land in the US state of Minnesota. If you choose to ever visit a rather obscure peninsula officially known as the Northwest Angle, you might want to bring your US passport. While the straight-line distance from Northwest Angle to the Lower 48 is less than 20 miles, to actually drive on a paved road, it’s a 60-mile road trip. Bring a case of Moosehead to justify you wasting a portion of your life to spend even a second there. You’ll need it.

Soon to be home of the endangered indigenous German, Belgian and Dutchman.

8). There are dozens of Belgian enclaves (sovereign territory) completely within the Netherlands (and one vice-versa). If the notion of enclaves seems ridiculous, just to make things more confusing, there are a handful of Dutch enclaves within the Belgian enclaves. C’mon, Europe… you had two World Wars within a 31-year time frame. Get your shit together.

7). German enclaves within Belgium. See explanation in #8. But in all fairness, Europe is lousy with enclaves and enclaves-within-enclaves, just like all those ‘stan countries of Central Asia (Turkestan, Khazakstan, Uzbekistan and Tajikistan).

Why, God?

6). Located within the East Indian district with the horrifying name of Cooch Behar, the island of Jhar Singheswar is another one of those pesky enclaves (Bangladesh within India). It is somewhat fitting that in the land of explosive diarrhea, the borders on this isle lean heavily to the definition of shit-show. The border is so poorly laid out, certain sections are as small as 125′ by 100′ (Bangladesh), one slice of India is roughly 1,000′ by 125′.

As barren as Cooch Behar.

5.) Ever feel like starting your own nation? Believe it or not, there’s an 800 square-mile, landlocked chunk of the Nubian Desert that not a single government on the planet has claimed. Known as the Bir Tawil Triangle, this uninhabited clump of super-heated real estate is between Egypt and Sudan. But before you decide to plant your flag on this little slice of Hell, know that for seven months out of the year, the mean high temperatures are between 99° to 108°. By the way, there is no natural source of water, and this place gets less than a couple of inches of rain per year.

More effort than it’s worth.

4). The mouth of the Bidassoa River is where the northernmost border ends between Spain and France. But just a couple of miles upriver is the curious case of Pheasant Island. Unlike the joint French-Dutch administration of St. Maarten Island in the Caribbean, Pheasant Island changes ownership every six months. When the Spanish as in charge, the Naval Commander of San Sebastian is the head honcho; when the French are in control, it’s the Deputy Director for the Sea and Coast of the Atlantic Pyrenees and Landes Departments,” who also inherits possibly the last royal title recognized by the secular French government; “Viceroy of Pheasant Island.”

Bustling nightlife north of the Arctic Circle.

3.) The entire border of the Canadian territories of Nunavut and the Northwest Territories. Liberal university professors delight in insulting European powers for literally setting international borders by simply “drawing lines on a map.” That’s pretty much what the leftist government of Canada did in 1999. There’s no rhyme nor reason for a border to begin with. While both territories combine for nearly 1.4 million square miles, both have the total population of a small Southern town (roughly 70,000).

Russia’s Big Diomede in the distance.

2). I’m about to ask you a question, and I’d like you to answer it with a knee-jerk reaction. What’s the minimum number of miles from the United States to the Russian Federation? Was your initial answer somewhere between 4,000 to 5,000 miles? You’d wrong. Don’t feel bad, that’s what most say. But more than a few immediately recall that Alaska isn’t all that far from Eastern Siberia. So, was your guess 100 miles or so? Still wrong. Right there in the middle of the Bering Sea, is Little Diomede Island, Alaska, USA… a whopping 2.5 miles from Big Diomede Island, Russia.

From the ‘Freeze ‘Em All” tour, 2013.

1). Every single border on Antartica. With the exception of a couple of square miles of VERY sparse vegetation on King George Island (same place Metallica did their Antarctic concert), the entire continent is an ice cube. Borders on Antarctica are pretty much the Oscars on the international level… they both exist, but why?